9.09.2007

My Lucky Stars Aligned

Just because I'm accident-prone doesn't mean I don't get cut a lucky break every once in a while. I've taken out enough insurance on Lucky Stars.com to guarantee that I manage to just skate by disaster instead of running head-on into it.

Ways I am luckier than you:

1. When I accidentally threw my keys in the dumpster, there was no real trash in it. Just bunches of leaves and a newly-discarded computer box. So it was very easy for me to simply jump, lean, and retrieve. Luck factor: 4.

2. Walking up the street to meet my man for football at the downtown sports bar, I tried avoiding some water that was running into the gutter. Step, step, slip! I'm not so good at the manuevering. And I was wearing flip-flops. And my foot somehow turned upside down, so my exposed toes were in for serious hurting. But I came away only filing off the nail polish on my big toe. This was super cool in two ways: that didn't hurt, and it wasn't a professional polish job so no big loss there! Then the guy who was standing at the entrance to the bar and witnessed the whole thing told me I was beautiful and that God loves me. Expert testimony from homeless people. Luck factor: 5. Because I could have broken something. And sued the city!

3. Blowing a tire is not a good thing, ever. But with high-performance low-profile tires being so fucking expensive, it's a worse thing. And when you do that, it's going to probably cost you another arm and a leg to replace that specialty rim too. But none of these things happened to me when I woke up at 6 am Friday morning. When the AAA guy pulled the tire off my car and saw that it was completely chewed up down to the metal threads, he said I was lucky it didn't come off during my nightly jaunt down the freeway at
excessive speeds. More expert testimony right there. Luck factor: 10+. LA freeways are no joke.

4. Not knowing that I was allergic to egg whites, or that my frozen yogurt concoction thingy had egg-anything in it, you can imagine my surprise when my throat closed up and I spent the next hour trying not to die from lack of breathing. But eventually Death loosened its grip on me and I was able to go about my Friday with live comedy and slow pizza delivery. It turned out to just be a low-level allergy. Luck factor: 10+.

5. Last night, I dreamt that I found money. Lots of it. This morning I got up to do laundry. And as I was loading pants into the washer, out fell a huge wad of cash. It was mostly just ones and fives, but that don't matter. Unexpected denari is like a gift from the gods. And now that I can make it appear simply by sleeping? Clearly, I'm the luckiest girl on earth! Luck factor: off the charts.

How lucky are you?

4 comments:

The littlest Princess said...

I am lucky that the Chargers pulled it off in the last quarter and managed not to lose so that my drive up from SD wasn't as awful as it could have been. I am lucky that I have Friends like the GPG and The KM to keep me sane with all the craziness going on in the world, and I'm lucky that I have finally kicked the icky cold that took a hold of me while I was in the land of red clay, humidity and mesquitos the size of small birds. Other than that I'm pretty average

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Unluckily, both the Raiders and Giants lost yesterday. But UCLA won on Saturday!

But we'll just call that skill and not luck.

Alexandra Scarborough (Sasha) said...

Damn, girl--start having some dreams for me! Um, one that includes wads of cash and a three-way with Ewan McGregor and Christian Bale, 'k?

DrinkJack said...

I consider myself pretty damn lucky to have run across you in this world.

Chiefs are living up to my expectations at 0-2. Raiders should have no problems at all.