8.02.2006

Waiting for "The Call"


Yesterday I received two unexpected and wildly differing phone calls.

9 am - cellphone rings from a 714 number:

"Hello, this is GPG."

"Hi GPG. This is Self-Important So-&-So with Such-&-Such Staffing Firm. I received your résumé in regards to a job I posted for a client. Now, I'm not one to mince words, so I'm just going to come right out and say this: you're not qualified for this job"

Then why is she wasting both our time calling me?

"This is an EVENT planning job, not a MEETING planning job. You need to be really creative. This is not rote. I was a meeting planner for 12 years and I wouldn't be qualified for this job. Do you think you could pull that off?"

"I do. [Insert something about being a fiercely creative photographer and having planned wildy ingenious events.] But it appears you have already made your mind up about my experience so I don't see the point in continuing this conversation."

But she wouldn't let it end there. She kept up her brusque tirade and finally, 5 minutes later, had talked herself into submitting my résumé to the client (who later told her they had already received it directly from me and were indeed considering it, effectively removing her--and her commission--from the process).

And for the record, the job listing stated Meeting Planner in the very title of the ad. Nice false advertising, yo.

***


6 pm - cellphone rings from a 310 number:

"Hello, this is GPG."

"Hi! This is the Really Cool Newly-Hired Director of Catering at Super-Swanky Private Beach Club. I saw your résumé online and feel you would be a perfect fit for the Catering Manager position [that I didn't apply for because I honestly didn't think I was qualified!] I have available. Is that something that you're interested in?"

I have an interview with her at 4 pm today.

In the mean time, I'm waiting for the ridiculously bureaucratic unemployment folks to call. They decided they need to review my case before granting me my frickin' $450 a week. Which isn't enough to pay my bills anyway, so I really should just tell them to suck my cock.

It couldn't hurt.

***

Just as I was about to publish this post, the unemployment folks called. It's all cleared up and they're going to start sending me money within the week. I didn't even have to tell them to suck it.

Yay!

7 comments:

exile said...

man, i didn't have nearly the luck you had when i was unemployeed.

through the bitterness i congradulate you

btw, those staffing people do that bullshit alot. once i went to one with a goth friend of mine and he pulled her aside and started lecturing her about the way she dressed. it was completely uncalled for (they have no tact).

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

Aw, but you own your own house, so you win!

SkookumJoe said...

superb!

That staffing woman, you see, was pissed off because the client overruled her. She didn't want to interview you out of spite, but knew she had to, so was at least trying to make you beg or something to satisfy her petty little ego.

She's on the baboon list.

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

I agree with Woody. The staffing woman was pissed off because after 12 years, she'd had to change careers and clearly wasn't very good at her new job either.

She had to call me later to eat crow about the first conversation, which is how I found out that the company already me in mind. I have an interview with them tomorrow!

Anonymous said...

Yay for you, YOU RULE!
things always work out for the best, and a really great job is just around the corner, good luck with everything and I can't wait to hear all about it, I will call you soon to check up on you.

exile said...

those that can, do.
those that can't, work in staffing agency's and become lunchmeat for baboons

David N. Scott said...

Man, what a weirdo. THe less people have, the more they want to hoard it...