12.27.2006

Got Rubbers?


For boys who need a little oomph when it comes to what they're packing in their Jockeys, try HUGE brand condoms.

No, they're not for the overly endowed. They're for the average pee-pee. That could use a little "ego boost." I kid you not.


From their website:

HUGE Brand was founded, in 2004, to be the alternative to traditional corporate condoms. We believe in bringing fun to safe sex and understand that responsibility doesn’t have to be boring. The clever twist to our youthful brand is that the condoms are actually standard size - it’s the packages that are larger.

HUGE Brand condoms were designed with quality and safety top of mind, but the packaging ensures a clever ego boost in every purchase. HUGE Brand has also changed the way we purchase condoms. Gone are the days of just buying 3, 12 and 36 packs.We offer customers a selection based on the length of their
…ummmm…layover.

Our condoms are available in three quantities:
The Nightcap (3 pack)
The Weekender (12 pack)
The Extended Stay (36 pack).


I didn't realize that "corporate" condoms were such a problem. I thought they were just a great way to avoid those nasty STDs and children. Wow. I apologize to all you men out there. I didn't know you had such a complex about your typical, run-of-the-mill Jimmy hats.

But honestly. If you're buying HUGE brand standard size condoms to make yourself feel better about your dick, that's LAME.

But, I'll open it up to a debate. To the boys who think differently: what you got to say, yo?

12 comments:

DrinkJack said...

There are words on the package? Sounds to me like they are going to be a laughing stock. Personally, I would just appreciate better choices, like Kimono, at the local drug store besides Trojans (those suck, IMHO).

Anonymous said...

I've never heard of such a thing...it would make a great gag gift. Can't see guys buying them to use as a crowd pleaser...

Anonymous said...

too bad those "Huge" condoms aren't magic.

Cuz then they could actually make something "huge" as oppossed to "eh" sized.

Anonymous said...

so.... the box is bigger, but the condoms are the same size? is this supposed to help with self esteem issues or something?? sounds like a lame marketing gimmick to me....

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

It's unanimous! 4 out of 4 bloggers agree: HUGE brand condoms are lame!

Jack: didn't you hear? ALL Trojans suck.

Anonymous said...

Wouldn't buying these be like going to a Big and Tall store and buying a brand called of pants "Lean"? You still know what size you are.

Plus, condoms shouldn't need to use sex to sell themselves. If you're buying rubbers, you've already got the sex thing going for you.

Anonymous said...

ur, ummm... brand of pants...

Ghetto Photo Girl said...

It's okay, Woodpecker. We undermeant what you stood (tm the Princess).

Also, one would HOPE you're already having the sex if you're buying the condoms.

In all seriousness, if I were working as a cashier and somebody bought these, I'm not sure I could keep a straight face. And then I'd feel bad. Which would suck.

Because that shit's funny.

Anonymous said...

yes going to extremes over self esteem is lame. Ask the cosmetic surgery industry.

Heidi on Vashon said...

HUGE is lame, but this copywriter girl gives props for fun -package- names, pun intended.

I'm not deviating Durex xtra-sensi if I have to go to La-la-latex land.

And I'm with you on the smell!

Anonymous said...

My ego only allows me to use BROBDINGNAGIAN brand condoms. I will even pay a premium over 'corporate condoms' for these.

David N. Scott said...

I really thought 'HUGE' for average people would be padded, or something--like having a length of rubber. If not, then its just funny marketing, so whatev.