Breaking the Cycle

I made a very important promise to myself today: no more OT.

It might seem like a no-brainer to normal people like you, but when you're a glutton for punishment you have a pathalogical work ethic like me, it's almost impossible to make this kind of shift. When you're so used to having your nose to the grindstone, throwing every bit of your soul into the task, defining yourself by the quality of your work, you just don't know any better. Life outside of the office? Is that allowed?

Fuck yeah! No more diabolical 60-hour week! No more eschewing a social life for the ball and chain that is my desk! No more killing myself for a job that I hate!

I used to have a really great life. At least from what I can dimly remember. Lots of friends, lots of plans, lots of fun. Now, all I do is work, work, work. It didn't help that I was in a relationship where he did the same thing. We fed each other's pathology. Now that it's over though, I'm leaving all those bad habits behind. I don't need the money, and I don't need the stress.

There will still be periods of time that I'm not going to be able to get around it. February, for example, is going to suck. But I'm treating myself to a cruise in March! It's called a well-fucking-deserved break.

I'm not a brain surgeon or a rocket scientist. I'm not saving lives or creating a better world for people to live in. I plan events for a very narrow portion of the white-collar population. Most of whom don't appreciate a damn thing. So why am I subjugating my entire life to them and their needs? What about my own?

Today I start concentrating on those. From here on out.

I like the new me already!