In this family, we love our deli meats. And we notice when one is missing.
GPG: Dad, did you buy prosciutto?
Dad: Oh, no.
GPG: Why not?
Dad: I forgot.
GPG: How could you forget that one? It's like forgetting to pick up your children!
Dad: Well, that happens too.
To make this my least active blogging month ever, I've given you a grand total of now 7 new posts. Shameful.
But by the time I actually sit down to write, all the words are gone. I could give you a rundown of my recent tweets, but that's kind of my last resort.
So...what are you up to?
Social networking will more than likely get you in trouble. And we all know I'm all for trouble.
Which is why you should read the stuff Mutha Mae puts out. One day, she's going to be famous and I can take credit for introducing her to you. I met her while networking socially, via this really cool device called the internetses. You should try it.
Plus she has twins from two different countries. How awesome is that? Even the Krazy Mommy, who is pretty rad in her own right, can't say her twins are from different countries. Or uteri, for that matter.
Enjoy!
The other night, my baby brother had to take his fancy-pants iPhone to get fixed. Baby Aladdin had stuck it in his mouth at some point, rendering it useless. On our way there, he felt the need to confess something:
Baby Brother: You're probably going to blog about what I'm about to tell you.
GPG: Why?
BB: The other night, I was bored. So I downloaded a trial version of World of Warcraft.
GPG: Oh dear god. You're such a dork.
BB: I just wanted to see what it was about.
GPG: DORK. And yeah, I'm totally blogging about that.
He knows me so well.
I forgot about how I use this blog as a time capsule. And the lack of blogging for the last few weeks might come back to bite me in the ass if I don't go burying nuggets of personal historical info in it and soon.
What's been going on? Well it turns out I own a dress that possesses magical powers. I don't know what it is about it, but every time I wear it, people go out of their way to compliment me. Like, emphatically. It's very...nice.
So when I thought I might run into someone from over the summer, I figured there would be no harm in wearing it. Nope, no harm. None. Not for the entire cocktail reception. Not on the corner outside the bar. Not in his car. And especially not from his office on the 19th floor of a downtown high rise. Overlooking the city. At night.
I'm clearly using my powers for good. It's delicious.
So have you all been reading my baby brother's blog? Because you should. He does crazy things like update regularly. Mostly on the hilarious hijinx that take place in the world of stupid people. Fun stuff.
Me, I've been too busy for your entertainment, and I'm not sure that's going to change anytime soon. Apologies all around, but such is life. For now:
1 missed Greek Festival
75 stories climb
0 pain endured after
1 very surprised, but apparently in-shape, GPG
6 songs by our favorite certain man
1 happy song he prefaced by quoting his favorite GPG
2 consecutive dates that held promise, then didn't
6 uncomfortable hours spent on the world's worst date
1 shot of absinthe
1 promise never to touch that crap again
2 fantasy football games won
3 fantasy football games lost
1 fantastic UCLA football comeback against the almighty SEC
3 consequent losses
3 days spent networking in Tucson
100 attendees
15 of us delayed at the airport
2 football games watched together
3 hours late getting home
1 tour of Staples Center
2 minutes sitting on the Kings bench
10 minutes hanging out in the Clippers locker room
1 picture taken of me crouching in Chris Kamen's locker
100 women met at the Wealthy Bag Lady event
2 of them encountered again that evening at The Kress
3 drinks comped at the Viceroy
35 year old scotch
65 dollars for the privilege
2 charity events in one evening
6 cocktail parties
2 mandated by work
News: today I became an exempt employee. Yay?
Tomorrow I work a 12 hour day. No yay.
The month by the numbers will be, consequently, delayed.
